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11 October 2024 - Story

Overcoming Adversity: Falis’s Journey of Strength and Hope

 

 "I felt like I was invisible. I was just a child myself, and soon I became a mother. Caring for my baby boy while grappling with my own pain felt overwhelming," says Falis*, a 16-year-old mother, her voice tinged with both strength and vulnerability.

 

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Falis*, a sixteen-year-old girl, lives with her parents in a village in the southwestern region of Somalia. As a young mother, she is raising her 18-month-old son in a household of nine. The family resides in a makeshift house constructed from sticks, poles, and corrugated iron sheets, reinforced with cow dung and sand for insulation.

As the eldest of three brothers and four sisters, Falis* shares a cramped living space with her parents and siblings. Life has been a constant struggle, especially after the loss of resources that once supported their livelihood. Recently, the family relocated to a new settlement near their original home, hoping for a fresh start despite the many challenges they face.

 

Falis’s* life changed significantly when her father, faced with financial hardship and unable to find stable work, made a difficult decision. The family's economic situation had been deteriorating for some time, and in a desperate bid to repay a debt, he arranged for Falis* to marry at the young age of fourteen. This decision, made under immense pressure, turned Falis’s* life into a means of alleviating the family’s financial burdens. Shortly after the marriage, her husband left the village in search of work, but he was unable to provide for the family, leaving Falis* to fend for herself. Eventually, this led to her divorce at a tender age, with a young child to care for.

 

The family's struggles began long before Falis’s* marriage. They had originally lived in a village to the west of their current home. However, due to the threat of conflict, lack of basic services, and the recurring droughts that plague the region, they were displaced from their home. The Bay region, like many parts of Southern and central Somalia, faces severe hardships due to the compounded effects of draughts and political instability. The droughts devastated their livestock, their primary source of sustenance and income, forcing them to abandon their village in search of a safer and more sustainable environment.

Seeking refuge, Falis*’s family made their way to a temporary home, hoping to escape the challenges they faced. They found a welcoming community where local villagers showed them kindness and support as they began the arduous process of rebuilding their lives. However, the realities of displacement, including limited access to education, healthcare, and secure income, continue to present significant challenges. Living in an overcrowded household with limited resources adds to the strain, making daily survival a test of endurance.

As the eldest child, Falis* carries the weight of her family’s expectations and responsibilities while also raising her young son. The emotional toll of early marriage, and motherhood at such a young age has left her with little opportunity to pursue her own dreams.

Despite these overwhelming difficulties, Falis* remains adamant in raising her son in a better circumstances.

Falis*’s life took a positive turn when she attended a community awareness session on the Sustainable Humanitarian Response and Prevention of Protection and GBV risks in Somalia (GAASHAAN) project. This initiative aims to address the needs of survivors and prevent further abuse, providing Falis* with a critical lifeline. During the awareness sessions, she learned about available support services for survivors of GBV and child protection concerns, prompting her to reach out for help. Encouraged by the information she received, she contacted a social worker who was part of Gargaar Relief and Development Organisation (GREDO) team that was leading the awareness campaign.

The social worker worked with Falis* through a comprehensive case management approach that prioritized her safety, dignity, and well-being. Recognizing the depth of her trauma, Falis* received psychosocial support to help her heal from the psychological and emotional scars left by her past. The mistreatments and challenges she faced had severely impacted her mental and emotional health. Falis* found a safe space to express her feelings, reflect on her experiences, and begin her healing journey.

Through counseling, Falis* slowly regained a sense of control over her life and learned coping strategies for the trauma she had experienced. After a thorough assessment of Falis*’s situation, and given her financial circumstances and the challenges of providing for her son, cash assistance was deemed a crucial intervention to alleviate some immediate economic pressure. She was supported with a one-time cash transfer of $99, intended to cover basic needs such as food, clothing, and other essentials for herself and her child. This financial support offered her relief and flexibility to prioritize urgent needs.

In addition to the cash support, Falis* received dignity kits containing essential hygiene and sanitary products, including soap, sanitary pads, toothpaste, and clothing. For women like Falis*, who face economic hardship and the stigma of being a young divorcee, access to these items is vital.

Falis*’s engagement in the GAASHAAN project also strengthened her connection to a wider community of women who have faced similar challenges, fostering a sense of solidarity and shared resilience.

Through the comprehensive support she received, Falis* emerged from the experience stronger and more determined to create a better future for herself and her son.

 

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FALIS*’S STORY.

‘‘My name is Falis*, and I am a sixteen-year-old mother.

My life changed completely when I was just fourteen years old. My father faced an incredibly difficult decision during a time of great hardship for our family.

We had been struggling for some time, with the drought taking away everything we relied on. Our livestock had perished, and we found ourselves without a source of income.

In a desperate attempt to settle a debt to a relative, my father made the heart-wrenching choice to marry me off to a man I had never met.

He expressed to me, 'There was no other way; the debt was weighing heavily on us.' That moment marked the end of my childhood.

Life with my husband was even more challenging than I had imagined. There was no kindness between us, and I faced misunderstanding and mistreatment.

I felt like I was invisible. I was just a child myself, and soon I became a mother. Caring for my baby boy while grappling with my own pain felt overwhelming.

Eventually, my husband left in search of work, and I was left to navigate life on my own. At sixteen, I found myself back in my parent’s home, divorced and responsible for a child. I felt broken and lost.

One day, I heard about the GAASHAAN program through an awareness campaign on gender-based violence and child protection.

They mentioned that help was available for people like me, and I decided to reach out. That’s when I met a social worker with GREDO, who listened to me intently, and for the first time, I felt truly heard and cared for.

Through the GAASHAAN project, I received psychosocial support. I attended these counseling sessions, which felt like I was finally beginning to breathe again after a long period of suffocation.

The pain I carried from the the trauma of my forced marriage started to lessen. I began to realize that I wasn’t to blame for what had happened to me. Slowly, I am starting to rebuild my life.

The team provided me with $99 as part of a cash assistance program. It might not sound like much, but to me, this has been a lifeline. I was able to buy food and clothing for myself and my child. Additionally, they offered me dignity kits filled with essential sanitary items and hygiene products.

Looking back, I experienced something painful and My life hasn’t been easy, and I still have a long way to go, but I am stronger now. I refuse to be defined by the circumstances I faced. The support I received didn't just help me survive; it helped me start living again.’’

 

Background / Project information

 

The GAASHAN Programme funded by the Foreign, Commonwealth & Development Office (FCDO) is aimed at providing sustainable humanitarian aid and prevention against protection and GBV risks in South Central Somalia, will directly benefit 43,756 individuals, including men, women, boys, and girls, with 5% being people with disabilities, across 18 districts in 9 regions. Additionally, around 117,200 indirect beneficiaries will be reached through advocacy and awareness efforts. The project is implemented by a consortium of organizations: Save the Children as Consortium Lead and other organizations International Rescue Committee, CARE International, Save Somali Women and Children (SSWC), Somali Women and Development Centre (SWDC), Somali Women’s Studies Centre (SWSC), and Gargaar Relief and Development Organization (GREDO).